


Demonic Apparitions, Strange Smells, and Internet Shows

by ohcaeiguess



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Buzzfeed Unsolved References, Crowley is an sob, I love them okay, M/M, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-24
Updated: 2019-09-24
Packaged: 2020-10-27 16:36:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20763518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohcaeiguess/pseuds/ohcaeiguess
Summary: Crowley convinces Aziraphale to participate in an episode of Buzzfeed Unsolved.





	Demonic Apparitions, Strange Smells, and Internet Shows

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [Apariciones demoníacas, olores extraños y programas de internet.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/19429318) by [RatsOnTheMoon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RatsOnTheMoon/pseuds/RatsOnTheMoon). 

> My first thought reading the original, other than "I haven't read anything in Spanish in four months, I hope my brain still works," was "How the fuck does Aziraphale sound so English in Spanish?" So uh, yeah.

If anyone asked Aziraphale why he had agreed to this, he would say that an angel’s life, without supervision and without the weight of the end of the world on his shoulders, could begin to get boring.

This was, of course, a lie. (An unsupervised angel can afford to lie once in a while.)

The truthful reason was coming through the bookshop door now, with a laptop in hand and the most enormous smile in the world. Aziraphale had known that mischievous smile for more than 6000 years, so he took off his reading glasses and locked the doors without leaving his seat. When Crowley smiled like that, nothing good was going to come of the situation. Better to keep the humans out of this.

“It came out,” was all the demon said, not quite masking the excitement in his voice.

“I’m sorry?”

“The video. The video those American YouTubers made about the bookshop.”

“Ah, yes. Shane and Ryan from… _ Buzzfeed Unsolved _, if I’m not mistaken?”

“Yes, them, angel.” Crowley let out an almost macabre laugh, setting the laptop on the counter and snapping his fingers to draw the curtains. “You don’t know how excited I am.”

“I think I have some idea,” Aziraphale laughed.

* * *

When the letter proposing said video had arrived, Aziraphale had flatly denied it. He didn’t need anybody investigating him or his bookshop. He might not be under Gabriel’s constant watch, but he didn’t want to test his luck.

Crowley, on the other hand, had thought it was an incredible idea, and when it came to temptations, Crowley had been the best since the beginning of time.

So here they were, in front of the computer a few months after filming.

* * *

“Press play, angel. It’s your bookshop, after all.”

The angel couldn’t help but feel a bit curious. After all, the experience had been much more fun than he had first expected.

* * *

_ “This week on _ Buzzfeed Unsolved _ we examine the mysterious bookshop _ A.Z. Fell and Co _ as part of our ongoing investigation into the question, Are ghosts real?” _

_ Shane shakes his head, skeptical as always._

* * *

“Do you think we gave him any doubts about the supernatural?” asked Aziraphale.

“Shh.”

* * *

_ “This London bookshop recently went viral after multiple reports of strange things happening inside the bookshop. Some clients report seeing unusual things that they don’t remember after leaving the establishment. Others mention strange smells or simply an intense urge to run from the place as quickly as possible. It is suspected that apparitions occur here, possibly even including” - the mysterious music in the background crescendos - _“a demon.”

_ “Strange smells?” says Shane. “Strange smells aren’t proof of a demon! Every bookshop in Los Angeles smells weird.” _

_ “And how do you explain the quantity of reports of strange experiences in this location in specific?” _

_ “It’s poorly ventilated and has a broken gas pipe.”_

* * *

Crowley fast-forwarded the video a few seconds.

“I want to see us.”

“You have some work to do on your patience, my dear.”

* * *

_ Ryan and Shane finally arrive at the bookshop, where Aziraphale has been waiting for them. _

_ “Mr. Fell,” says Ryan, “Could you talk to us a bit about the reports that have recently come to light?” _

_ “In all honesty, I think they’re all hoaxes.” _

* * *

Crowley and Aziraphale laughed at the ridiculous accent and tone of voice Aziraphale had used for the entirety of the interview (another of Crowley’s magnificent ideas). 

* * *

_ “I have owned this bookshop for years and never seen anything strange.” _

_ Obviously Anthony, Mr. Fell’s partner for many years, has something else to say. _

_ “Yeah, this place is cursed. Definitely,” Crowley, who has been growing a mustache just for the video, says. _

_ “What makes you say that?” _

_ “You can feel it, can’t you? It smells like demons… and Chinese food.” Ryan frowns. “Oh! And once in a while… strange people come. Clients buying pornographic books.” _

_ “Strange in what way?” _

_ “Everything about them is strange. If you ask me, I suspect that they’re aliens. It’s something… you know, ineffable.”_

* * *

“Crowley!” Aziraphale said between laughs. “If Gabriel saw this…”

“Gabriel has no idea how to use the internet, angel. Plus, did you see that poor American’s face?”

* * *

_ “If there is a presence here, show yourself.” _

_ For a few seconds, Shane and Ryan explore the bookshop in the darkness. With every second that passes, Ryan looks more distressed. _

_ Then the alarm on a small device begins to sound and Ryan approaches Shane to see what’s happening. _

_ “The energy level is rising,” he announces. “It’s more than ten… it’s- it’s not stopping.” _

_ And suddenly Shane starts laughing and points the camera towards the device’s screen. _

_ With the alarm still ringing, the screen has stopped on the number 69._

* * *

At this point Crowley was crying of laughter, leaning against the counter trying to gather his wits enough to turn his attention back to the screen. Aziraphale hid his face in his hands, laughing.

* * *

“_ It is impossible to know if the mysteries that occur within _ A.Z. Fell and Co _ are simple coincidence or the manifestation of something outside of our understanding. Needless to say, inexplicable things definitely happen in this bookshop. But for now, the case will remain Unsolved.”_

* * *

“This is the best,” he broke off laughing, “fucking,” laughter again, “video in history.” Crowley collapsed, sprawled on the floor.

“I have to admit that it was quite entertaining.”

“Entertaining? It’s a masterpiece of comedy, angel, that’s what it is!”

“I feel bad for that poor boy, the shorter one. He was so sure he would find proof of something supernatural.”

“They’ll be okay, I’ll make sure to put an apparition in their next video with a more… demonic form.”

“Don’t even think about it, Crowley.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much to FangirlftShipper for giving me permission to translate this work! If I totally missed a point or took a liberty I shouldn't have in the translation, please let me know so I can fix it. I changed a few things wrt switching between the video and the Husbands watching it, bc I'm a slut for line breaks, but the sentences are in the same order and all that. This is (a) my first time posting to the Archive and (b) my first time doing a translation for pleasure, so I hope people enjoy it as much as I enjoyed playing with it!


End file.
